Tuesday 11 December 2007

i hate my christian upbringing...



mostly written, 11/Dec/07 - mostly ....

i hate my "christian" upbringing...

in my mind when something happens, it's always an exclamation like ... "god this sux!" or "thank god!" or "jesus christ!" .. for all my life.. that's what my brain does, then my conscious mind kicks in and qualifies "god" as being "the universe, aka god" ... "god damn it" ..

you know ... fucking funny if it turned out that the people who said the lords' name the most or "thanked god" or made little quips like "god make this pain go away" were the ones who got their prayers answered... I mean god must be frikking busy right? .. he listens to all our prayers does he not? he doesn't make them all come true but some he does...

is this why you're not supposed to say the lord's name in vain? because every time you do it's like ... "oh here comes another prayer!! ... oh... false alarm, another person kicked their toe, god dammit!"

devout christian prayer:

dear god, i give you thanks on this day of my new job that i prayed i would get last month, you remember. right? well, today is my first day and I really need to make a good impression and i can't seem to find my keys and i know i put them somewhere......

meanwhile, here is me with my short curt prayer to god:

god damn it!! I can't find my keys!! where are they?

then god sends that bit of energy that triggers that brain cell to wake up and remember where the keys were.. meanwhile the other guy who procrastinated, didn't get his prayer answered.. well, because he took too frikking long.. god must be pretty busy, he ainst got time to hear all that, he ainst got time to fix shingles, nor to fix no window pane, he's a gunna leave this place he's ...how does that go again?

Ain't got time to fix the shingles
Ain't a-got time to fix the floor
Ain't got time to oil the hinges
Nor to mend no windowpane
Ain't a-gonna need this house no longer
She's a-gettin' ready to meet the saints




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these are my rantings about religion - i speak fluent sarcasm - know this when you are reading and it will save you some heartache.